Mean Moms

By Jennifer Mayer

Yesterday I was quoted in an article called The Rise of the Mean Moms on Marie Claire’s site. When I was a new mom with a 3 week old baby, I attended a new mom’s meet-up. There was a small circle of women with their newborns, chatting about their birth stories and where the hospitals they gave birth at. I mentioned I had a home birth. I know some people have strong feelings against home birth- or that it’s not a choice for them- and I get that. But there was a mom in the group who exclaimed that she would “never risk her child’s life like that” and that she was a pediatric physical therapist and has seen “what can happen”.

I was horrified.

It was awful hearing and feeling such judgment that I would risk my beautiful baby’s life by where I chose to give birth. It felt like such a dig at who I was, and what my priorities were. Plus, home birth’s are evidence based care, and a safe option for low risk mothers.

This interaction had such an impact on me that I’m still talking about it today! Parenting is hard. I really feel that short of abuse and neglect, parents need to be kinder to each other, and respect that other’s choose different parenting choices than they might choose themselves. I’d say for the most part, we as parents all want to do a good job, and do right by our children. There isn’t a one right way to parent- only what works for your family. I hope by sharing my story in this article, it reached other new moms, and moms-to-be and helps them see how diverse the parenting landscape is, and how there isn’t just one way to be a good mom.

Jen Mayer